I thought about the many things I could write about as my first "real" post, and 'Wedding Stuff' is the one that really came to mind.
Ross is really not the social type, and I probably could have easily invited 150 people. However, the average cost of a wedding is something like $60-$120
per person, and well, we're broke. We've been really lucky with sticking to our budget, but to be fair, it was with Shelli's help. She paid for my dress, Ross' ring, the photography and gave us $500 as a wedding gift. Through it all, we're going to be able to get married
20 days from now without our bank account going into the red.
We're mostly ditching "tradition" with the whole thing though. I mean, we live in Vegas, we could easily pick a chapel and do some big reception at one of the hotels, but that's not us. The last thing I want to do, is to stand up in front of my loved ones on one of the biggest days of my life and pretend to be a princess, making promises to be with this man forever and to live happily ever after. I am going into this thing knowing full well that there's a possibility that we wont be together forever. But standing up in front of our loved ones and saying "I promise to stay in this thing for as long as I can stand you" somehow doesn't seem as romantic. So, I took to the internet to find ceremony alternatives. Ross and I are both Agnostic, so not only did we have to find a ceremony that didn't include us making promises we didn't quite agree with, we also had to find a ceremony, and venue for that matter, that didn't have God or Religion as a centerpiece.
After months of "research", we decided on a Celtic Handfasting. We're both Irish, and we loved the idea of going back to
real tradition. I'll post the "script" for our ceremony below, but first, some pictures.
The Dress!
The necklace I am wearing in the photos is THE necklace I'll be wearing to the wedding. I haven't decided if I'll be wearing my glasses during the ceremony or not, probably not though.
My daughter's dress.
As for the other flower girls (there will be three) I don't have a picture of their dresses, but I have told everyone in the wedding party to wear whatever they want. The oldest flower girl has chosen a pink knee-length dress with purple and blue butterflies on it and the other has chosen a white dress with little pink flowers on it.
Because I didn't want to have to choose between Ross' youngest brothers, I gave each of them a job for the wedding. Joel will hold the handfasting cords, and Kenny and Gavin will be "ring bearers". They each have their own suit for the wedding, pictured below minus the pants for each, which match the vests. Ross and Eric are just going to wear suits they already have.
The venue will be Ross' older sister and her fiance's backyard. We're going to put the tables out on the grass, and their detached one car garage-turned-theater (the white double doors in the picture are to the theater) is going to double as the ceremony spot and dance floor. The spot with the umbrella over it is meant to be a bar area, but we're going to be using that space to put out the food buffet-style and have the drinks up on the patio near by. The picture was taken from the fire pit, so naturally our favors are going to be smores makings.
Now, onto the script:
Officiant:
(This is the opening statement for the Officiant, Trinity's Papa. He hasn't gotten back to me yet on what exactly he'll say but I'm sure whatever it is, it'll be great.)
In lieu of the more traditional vows, Ross and Tyleena have decided to exchange the vows associated with the Celtic Handfasting Ceremony. This is an ancient ceremony that pre-dates the religious sanctioning of marriage. It allows for the visual representation of the connection that has always existed between these two, and the commitment they are making today. One of the main things that attracted these two to the ceremony besides the Celtic tradition was the acknowledgement of both the positive and the negative aspects to inherit in life and in relationships. Ross and Tyleena, please join hands and hold the cord between you. [The cords are placed between us] These are the hands that will passionately love you. These are the hands that countless times will wipe the tears from your eyes... tears of sorrow, and of joy. These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear and grief rack your mind. These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times. These are the hands that will give you support and encourage you to chase your dreams. Together, everything you wish can be realized.
Tyleena, will you honor Ross?
ME:
Yes
Officiant:
Ross, will you honor Tyleena?
ROSS:
Yes
Officiant:
Will you both seek to never cause to break this union?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
yes
Officiant ties the cord and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant:
Tyleena, will you share his laughter?
ME:
Yes
Officiant:
Ross, will you share her laughter?
ROSS:
Yes.
Officiant:
Will both of you look for the brightness in life and positive in each other?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
yes
Officiant ties the cord again and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant:
Ross, will you share her dreams?
ROSS:
Yes
Officiant:
Tyleena, will you share his dreams?
ME:
Yes
Officiant:
Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
Yes
Officiant ties the cord again and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant:
Ross, Will you cause her pain?
Ross:
I may.
Officiant:
Is this your intent?
ROSS:
No.
Officiant:
Tyleena, will you cause him pain?
ME:
I may
Officiant:
Is this your intent?
ME:
No.
Officiant:
Will you share each other's pain and seek to ease it?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
Yes
Officiant ties the cord again and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant:
Tyleena, will you burden him?
ME:
I may
Officiant:
Is that your intent?
ME:
No
Officiant:
Ross, will you burden her?
ROSS:
I may
Officiant:
Is that your intent?
ROSS:
No.
Officiant:
Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
Yes
Officiant ties the cord again and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant:
Ross, will you cause her anger?
ROSS:
I may
Officiant:
Is that your intent?
ROSS:
No.
Officiant:
Tyleena, will you cause him anger?
ME:
I may
Officiant:
Is that your intent?
ME:
No
Officiant:
Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union?
ROSS AND I TOGETHER:
Yes
Officiant ties the cord a final time and says:
So the binding is made.
Officiant, with Ross repeating after each line:
Ross repeat after me:
I, Ross Maxwell Gloekler,
take you Tyleena Lynn Fowler
to my hand, my heart, and my spirit
to be my chosen one.
To desire and be desired by you,
to possess you, and be possessed by you,
without sin or shame,
for naught can exist in the purity of my love for you.
I promise to love you wholly and completely
without restraint,
in sickness and in health,
in plenty and in poverty,
in life and beyond,
where we shall meet, remember, and love again.
I will not seek to change you in any way.
I will respect you, your beliefs, and your ways
as I respect myself.
Officiant, with me repeating after each line:
Tyleena repeat after me:
I, Tyleena Lynn Fowler,
take you Ross Maxwell Gloekler,
to my hand, my heart, and my spirit
to be my chosen one.
To desire and be desired by you,
to possess you, and be possessed by you,
without sin or shame,
for naught can exist in the purity of my love for you.
I promise to love you wholly and completely
without restraint,
in sickness and in health,
in plenty and in poverty,
in life and beyond,
where we shall meet, remember, and love again.
I will not seek to change you in any way.
I will respect you, your beliefs, and your ways
as I respect myself.
Officiant:
Tyleena and Ross, as your hands are bound together now,
so your lives and spirits are joined in a union of love and trust. The knots are not formed by these cords but by your vows and your ever-renewing intentions. Either of you may drop the cords, for always you hold in your hands the making and breaking of this union. So I charge you to start every day striving to fulfill the vows you've made today.
Above you are the stars and below you is the Earth.
Like the stars, your love should be constant,
and like the Earth, a firm foundation from which to grow.
Let the powers of the mind and of the intellect guide you in your marriage, let the strength of your wills bind you together, let the power of love and desire make you happy, and the strength of your dedication make you inseparable. Be close, but remain individual. Have patience with one another, for storms will come but they will pass quickly. Be free in giving affection and warmth. Have no fear and let not the ways of the unenlightened give you unease, for love is with you always.
As a symbol of the cords binding them together, Ross and Tyleena have chosen to exchange rings.
[Eric hands my ring to Ross.]
Officiant:
Ross, repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed.
ROSS:
With this ring, I thee wed.
[My sister hands Ross' ring to me.]
Officiant:
Tyleena, repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed.
ME:
With this ring, I thee wed.
Officiant:
(This is where the officiant's closing statements or anything else he'd like to add goes.) You may now seal your vow with a kiss.
Ross and Tyleena kiss, and walk back up the isle still bound.
Aaaaaaand thats pretty much it! :)
Til next time!
